1. Don’t inform your cat that he is getting a wash
You must sneak up on the cat, kidnap him, and smuggle him into the bathroom where you will lock the doors, barricade him in, and then turn on the water. If there are any cats to be bathed after this one, make sure you turn music on very loudly to drown out the screaming that is sure to be coming from not only your cat, but most likely you as well. You wouldn’t want to tip off your next victims. I mean other cats. Popular Read: Why Does My Cat Scratch The Sides Of The Litter Box? – Simple Explanation
2. Avoid overfilling the tub with water
There are many, many reasons that I advise against this. Sure, it seems like a great idea — soap him up, and then dunk him clean — but I assure you it’s not. What will ensue will be a scene straight out of some Animal Planet alligator wrestling show where the two of you will both be fighting for your lives while you attempt, in vain, to keep his sharp teeth away from you.
You may even fall into the tub while trying to restrain the little beast. I won’t comment on that personally, but I will say that no one can blame a person if that were to happen. You never know what might take place during a fight for your life.
3. Avoid showering with your cat
Enclosing yourself in a confined place where your feline friend cannot escape might seem like a pleasant alternative to having to physically restrain your cat in the bathtub, but I assure you it’s not. I learned this the hard way, when my cat freaked out at the water flowing under him towards the drain and decided to climb me like a tree. Thankfully, I’ve blocked out most of that incident, but what I do remember is screaming “GET IT OFF OF ME” to my boyfriend and walking around for the next week looking like I had gotten into a fight with a squirrel.
4. Never attempt cat baths without assistance
Do not be fooled by the fact that when you add water your cat shrinks down to half his size. Just because Fluffy went from a great big Persian pillow down to a hamster with eyes that now look way too big for his body, this animal still possess strength and speed that defies reason. You are going to need an extra set of hands to actually wash your feline friend while you battle to keep your skin in its original form while holding him down. You may also need someone to tend to your wounds in case you suffer enormous blood loss. Popular Read: Why Does My Cat Scratch The Sides Of The Litter Box? – Simple Explanation
5. When bathing cats, avoid using any fancy techniques
If you have any fabulous ideas like taping baby socks onto your tiny feline friend’s feet to avoid being scratched, or wearing snow pants, bird gloves, and possibly a face shield while bathing your cat, forget it. Now, I’m not saying that I tried any or all of these things — I’m just throwing it out there that I’m pretty damn sure none of these options work. No matter how much you want them to. Trust me.
Have you ever tried your hand at cat baths? How long did it take you to recover? Is there any scarring? Share your war stories about bathing cats in the comments.